The one where I realize I’m still a 15 year old girl.
Aaand just when you feel like you have nothing to write about, your teenage daughter asks you to go to Target for some, uh, lady supplies.
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| photo credit: fash-eccentric.com |
Wait. Scratch that.
She actually first asked me if ‘Dad was going to Target on his way home?’
M: I don’t know. Why?
T1: Uh, because I was wondering if he could maybe get me some ‘lady supplies*’?
*BTW, we do not actually use the words ‘lady supplies’ in this house, but if I get any more specific she will be a million times more embarrassed than I’m sure she already is. Sucks to be the teenage daughter of a blogger.
M: Hmm. I think I can say with unequivocal certainty that Dad would prefer if you got your sweet little fanny in the car we got for you and went to Target yourself for your lady supplies.
T1: Noooooo! I can’t do that!! That’s waay too embarrassing!!
Seriously, I shudder to think what this child will do in college.
So, never one to pass up an excuse to spend some time roaming the aisles at Target (especially at Christmastime), I volunteered.
And when I got there, I panicked.
Because here’s the thing. When I need to shop for ‘lady supplies’ my cart is always full of lots of other Targety things like paper towels and cat food and laundry detergent and pj pants and cute socks and Sweedish Fish and colorful measuring cups and coffee mugs with whimsical owls on them. And I don’t even think about it.
But tonight I had 2 things on my list.
Lady. Supplies.
And when I walked in and realized this, I panicked. And I knew I had to fill up that cart.
So I called Husband and explained my predicament.
M: So do you need anything? Anything at all??
H: Contact solution.
M: Really? That’s it? Anything else? Deoderant? Razors? Artificial Christmas tree? All-weather floor mats??
H: Um, maybe some neosporin. And condoms. Bahahahaha.
He’s freakin’ hilarious.
Here’s what I ended up with. I am not lying.
Jumbo bag of cotton balls
Q-tips
12 pack of soap bars
Shampoo
Conditioner
Razors
Shaving Gel
Hairbrush
Comb
Contact Solution
Teddy Grahams
Neosporin
Peanut Butter
Paper Plates
8 boxes of Christmas lights
oh yeah, and LADY SUPPLIES
Did we need all of that crap? Eventually we will, suuure.
Did it hide the lady supplies?
You bet it did, especially after I built a wall around them with boxes of Christmas lights and threw the bag of cotton balls on top.
Genius.
Until I had them all laid out on the checkout belt and my (male) neighbor walked up behind me.
Next time, Dad gets to go.
I love this!! We’re not there yet as far as the Female Spawn needing their Lady Supplies – but it is sort of like buying condoms in your hometown and having your Mom’s best friend walk up and ask what you’re shopping for!!! Stay strong sista!! Love love love you blog and I’m thankful to have found it!
I’m 25 & I still hate buying lady supplies, especially when it’s the only thing I need to buy. I ran as fast as I can to the self checkout & try to cover the supplies as much as I can!
hahaah…. that is hilarious!
ahahahahaha….this is so me! My Mom seriously wondered what I would do went I went off and lived by myself. The answer is that I made her buy at least 6 months supply before I started college…and once I got married, I made my husband buy them. He’s a nurse who doesn’t seem to be easily embarrassed by anything, so it works well for us!
I have to buy all the lady supplies for my household. Two teens already going through puberty and one husband who would rather put on a bikini and dance down my street singing ‘Girls Just Wanna Have Fun’ than to go into a store and buy a lady supply.
The task always falls to me. I’m good with going in and letting the world know that the whole family is bleeding. I’ll go get your lady supplies next time. š
HAHAHAHA! Love it! š
That is funny. Yea – I could care less any more though if anyone sees my lady supplies.
Too funny! I do ok with those ladies supplies but when I was buying pregnancy tests left and right I was always worried I would run into someone I would know and they would peer in my cart. hahaa.
LOL my girls are so funny about that too!! When we were on vacation this summer they spent the night with their two girl cousins and I was running my 13 year old a paper sack with lady things because she couldn’t dare ask them for some even though there are 3 females that live in the house.
This is seriously hilarious. And so true!
Dammit – guess what I forgot to buy today?! **face-palm**
I saw your comment on the MN Blogger group and decided to stop over. Good effort on trying to cover up the lady supplies. I wrote a post a while back about getting caught two different times on the same day attempting to purchase ovulation strips. Seriously! I bolted out of the first place because I recognized someone, only to bugger off to the next place and be confronted by another person I knew. I ended up buying the gosh damn things….but from here on out I am ordering online.
Seriously? I make my 16 y/o SON go & buy them for me, even without having to buy anything else & he doesn’t blink an eyelash. š
Haha! I see where your daughter gets the fear from š