Another letter to ass-hat parents.

asshat2
Last week I was walking down the sidewalk in the small town near our cabin, and coming toward me was a large man-boy who was walking about three feet in front of his tiny little girl who was about two years old and was toddling along at the normal pace for a toddling two year old.

He stopped, sighed, turned and yelled — angrily — “Come ON! I don’t have all day! You better keep up with me right now or you’re gonna get it. Right NOW!!” and then walked back and grabbed her little arm and yanked her so she was practically flying along beside him.
Did I mention she was two (at the most)?
Toddling down a sidewalk behind her angry-barely-legal father?
Who had no patience with her toddling?
Get a stroller, dude.

About two days later I was browsing along in Famous Footwear and a woman came in with her two kids and immediately started yelling at them about “having to buy their god damned shoes so they better behave”. She told one to “stop acting like such an idiot” and threatened to send the other one (who was about five years old) out to sit in the car alone.

I hear it everywhere.
Parents being gigantic douchewads to their kids.
So I decided to write another letter.

*You can read the first one HERE.*
Dear jack-hole parents who verbally abuse and insult their kids in public,
 
First of all, let me get something out of the way.
I, too, yell at my kids.
Every parent who is not a lying-liar-who-lies yells at their kids.
Kids can be irritating little sacks of shit at times, I get it. 
But please, for the love of Fred Rogers, stop belittling them and berating them in public.
In fact, you really should make it a point to not belittle and berate your children ever, but if you’re gonna be the jack-tard kind  of parent who does it, do it in the privacy of your own trailer, for god’s sake.
I am shitsick tired of listening to you bully your children in the aisles of Target or at the mall or the zoo. The zoo – where you supposedly went under the pretense of being a good parent and to enjoy some quality family time. Guess what? A lot of other people actually do want to enjoy the zoo with their kids and don’t need to be listening to you bitch at your three year old about not being able to keep her SpongeBob popsicle from melting down the front of her ratty Bratz® T-shirt.
 
Hey douchewad, they’re kids. They’re gonna do dumb shit! If that inconveniences you, please remember that fact the next time you have unprotected sex with that shit-for-brains ass-clown who thinks wearing his trucker hat slightly off-center and his jeans below his butt makes him look boss. 
Did it ever enter your imbecile brain to think that maybe, just maybe, your kids aren’t actually the problem? 
Listen, every time you open your giant pie-hole and spew obscenities and put-downs at your kid, you’re teaching them what is acceptable to hear, and what they’re worth. 
And guess what? 
One day, your little sack of shit is gonna be a big sack of shit, just like you. 
 
Sincerely,
You’re (so not) my favorite today. 



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  • Lindsey A - Wow, it’s so sad that parents treat their children like that in public. Imagine how they treat their children in their own home. =[ReplyCancel

    • Michelle - That’s exactly what worries me. And makes me certain that those kids will grow to treat others like crap because they’ve always been told that’s what they are.ReplyCancel

  • Considerer - Ohhhhhh this bugs me HUGE. Well done you. Can’t tell you how much for an unhappy infertile this makes me see white-hot-magma.ReplyCancel

    • Michelle - “…see white-hot-magma” – love that expression.
      Thanks for reading! 🙂ReplyCancel

  • Terrye Toombs - Yep, I see it everywhere, too.
    Found you via the “I Don’t Like Mondays” Blog Hop.ReplyCancel

  • Vanessa Jimenez - My mom was borderline belittling, however, she never ever did this in front of other people. Ever. And I am very grateful to her for that. There was some shaming when we got home, and I in turn, learned this sense of shame, otherwise shit would have hit the fun with all the things I would try to get away with later in teen years. I do feel that teaching a child what they are doing wrong is extremely important, humiliating them in public is a large picture of immaturity on the parents part.
    Loved the entry!ReplyCancel

    • Michelle - Agree that there always needs to be strict boundaries and that discipline is important, it just needs to be done correctly (which is always very subjective). Humiliation is never an option in my book.
      Thanks for the thoughtful comment – 🙂ReplyCancel

  • Becky - So sad to hear this happening in public (or ever, really)! I heard a mom yell at her (13-ish year old) daughter the other day that she wouldn’t buy her “that ugly shirt” that her daughter had picked out. I’m sure the girl was so embarassed that her mom had yelled at her in front of about 10 other customers in the area. Broke my heart to hear that!ReplyCancel

    • Michelle - It’s really sad when parents almost get superiority complexes around their children. Sure, “I’m the parent and I’m the boss” is the message…but why can’t you be a fair boss instead of a tyrant? I’m thinking it has a lot to do with the way they themselves were raised.
      Thanks for the comment!
      xoReplyCancel

  • Kathy Radigan - This was so sad, I feel for those poor babies!! Whenever I do hear a parent speak like that to one of their children I want to cringe inside. Thank you so much for bringing this in the forefront!!ReplyCancel

    • Michelle - Well, I didn’t really do it in a polite way, but hey, I had to speak their language, did I not??
      😉ReplyCancel

  • Kaitlin - This is one of the best things I have ever read. I see this all the time. I don’t have kids and one of the things that scares me most about ever having them is that I will accidentally be a bad parent…but sometimes the outright ridiculousness I see happening between parents and kids just baffles me. How could you ever think it’s OK to tell your kid to shut the f*ck up in a CVS? I wanted to ask a lady that the other day but she terrified me.ReplyCancel

    • Michelle - First of all, thank you for saying that first thing! You made my day!!
      And listen, don’t worry about it. I can already tell you won’t be THAT parent because you are AWARE. Parenthood is fraught with mistakes and you’ll certainly say a thing or two you wish you wouldn’t have somewhere along the way, but if you remember that it’s YOU who your kids are learning much of their behavior from, you’ll be fine. I mean, as long as you aren’t a giant dickwad, obviously. 😛ReplyCancel

  • Christine - My favorite phrase “lying-liar-who-lies”. LOL Awesome post! I don’t even have children (just MUCH younger siblings and lots of nieces/nephews) and this shit MAKES ME SO MAD! You’re so right! If that is the only behavior example their children ever see…how do they expect them to act like little angels?!?!!?!?ReplyCancel

  • Linda Roy - Standing ovation. It makes me so sad whenever I see or hear about this kind of thing. You’re right on, mama.ReplyCancel

    • Michelle - Well, thank you, but in this case I kind of hate to be right.
      Oh, who am I kidding. I love to be right.
      ReplyCancel

  • Cary Vaughn - I would seriously buy and read a book of these.ReplyCancel

  • thevoltz2000 - It makes me so incredibly sad when I hear parents speaking to their kids in a way that belittles, degrades, and/or demeans them. I don’t mind yelling so much when they are saying “you better put that pack of MnM’s back or you will NOT GET A MOVIE TONIGHT!” because that is pretty acceptable and discourages your child from becoming a petty thief. But when you call your child an idiot or in any way make them feel they are to blame for something that is entirely NOT their fault because they are a TODDLER….that makes me incredibly sad.ReplyCancel

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