Does the title I gave this post concern you?
Don’t worry, you’re TMI-safe.
In a week and a half I have a colonoscopy (my third — fourth?) and I plan to write a diary about my experience this time and share it with you.
Bet you can hardly wait.
Today, however, you can rest easy.
Unlike me in a week and a half.
I’ll admit, I didn’t originally buy these for the fiber, and since my knowledge of the amount of fiber that you should have each day is akin to the knowledge Kim Kardashian has about modesty, I’m gonna assume 5g isn’t a fantastic amount.
(I just checked. 5g is 20%. But I probably shouldn’t eat five. Which I’ve considered.)
These thick, chewy, crumbly squares are insanely delicious.
They make a terrific breakfast, mid-afternoon snack, or dessert. Their deliciousness makes me question the mere 150 calories they claim to contain, and make me—and my colon—happy.
2. Seven Daughters Chardonnay
This Chardonnay is my favorite (this week) because:
A. It’s light, citrusy, and crisp
B. It’s $10.99
C. It’s wine
D. All of the above
If you picked D (for “duh”) you are correct. But, there’s another hidden reason this wine is my favorite today (hint, hint).
THE LABEL MATCHES MY BLOG.
Could you die?
Those colorful dots make me deliriously happy, and since Chardonnay does as well, you can only imagine the euphoria I felt this week when I discovered it.
I’m pretty sure it’s even good.
3. Chicken Fajita Soup
Contrary to what that photo looks like, there is soup under all my homemade tortilla strips and cheese. (And by “homemade” I mean I cut up a corn tortilla into strips and baked them in the oven for 10 minutes.)
I’m a huge fan of throwing some chicken breasts in the crock-pot with something easy (salsa, honey-sesame sauce, teriyaki sauce, BBQ sauce), turning it on low for five hours and ending up with dinner. This week I discovered a new, super easy way to cook it, which was perfect for this chilly time of year.
You know I hate to cook, and will only make things that have like eight ingredients or less. One of my favorite recipe sites is “Six Sister’s Stuff,” which is a site run by six sisters who are ridiculously adorable and who you know are the kind of best friends that television shows are based on. Many of my favorite recipes on my “What’s For Dinner?” Pinterest board come from their site because they’re so easy and delicious, and this one is no exception.
You can find the recipe HERE. Trust me, you’ll want to take the time to click away to it (after you finish reading this post, obviously).
I won’t post the recipe here because I’m a rule follower.
4. My new, high-tech treadmill holder for my iPad
If you follow me on Facebook or Instagram you probably saw this photo on Wednesday, although Facebook can be a selfish b*tch about showing you stuff in your newsfeed (which is why you should set an ALARM on your phone to check the YMFT Facebook page once or twice a day so you don’t miss any of the scintillating things I share).
For years—about 10—my treadmill has been in the corner of my basement (finished basement) near a giant television. I’m not kidding, it’s huge. And it sits like 6′ from that treadmill.
Watching Ellen and other mindless but entertaining shows on my DVR (Fashion Police, E! News) has been great motivation to get me walking over the years. Sometimes, even trotting.
About six months ago I discovered I could no longer see the screen—the giant screen, SIX FEET FROM THE TREADMILL—clearly enough without my distance glasses.
And I hate to wear my glasses when I sweat.
So I stopped working out, obviously.
Recently I’ve realized that I’ve been spending way too much of my free time bingeing on shows on my iPad while sitting on my ever-expanding, lazy butt. Wouldn’t it be great to be able to watch these shows on a screen FIFTEEN INCHES from my face while on the treadmill? No sweaty glasses!
So I rigged up a rope I found in our cat-toy basket to the elastic stylus loop on the cover of my iPad (which I hung over the front of the treadmill) and threaded it under the emergency hold bar and tied it up. I can still lift the iPad up to adjust the speed and incline as I trot.
5. My Back Buddy
Last week I teased you with this picture:
It’s a back massager, duh.
Okay, seriously. That is not a plastic penis by her mouth.
For years I’ve suffered from a gigantic, grapefruit-sized knot under my right shoulder blade. Thankfully, I have a husband with great thumbs and a willingness to rub it out whenever I ask.
But sometimes, the knot strikes during the day, and it works its way up to my neck and the back of my head quickly. I’ve been known to find the edge of a chair, or the top of the stair banister and lay backward on it and wiggle around to try to get relief.
*Insert your own joke here*
But now with my Back Buddy, I can work the knot out easily whenever I need to, just like the lady in the photo is doing, but on my right side!
It’s a weird contraption, no question, and I haven’t taken the time yet to read the little book to learn what all those other knobs and handles can do (I’m not entirely sure I want to know), but if all I ever use it for is to loosen that shoulder knot, it’s a favorite.
The fact that my husband is the one who gave it to me so I quit begging him to work that knot out on a daily basis tells me it’s probably his favorite, too.
That’ll do it for this week, my friends! I’m off to the mall with Thing 2 (teacher inservice day), which I’m sure will result in several shopping bags of new favorites to share next week.
Don’t forget to check out my latest Parenthood recap over on Entertainment Weekly (next Thursday is the series finale, so it’s fair to say that next Friday I’ll be under the covers most of the day), and if you’re into self-torture and have an hour to kill, check out my latest Bachelor recap.
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